I am horrible. I know. Maybe I'm not a "blogger?" Anyhow, enough of that. I'm back for today at least and have new news with my dad. He went to his pre-op visit in Oklahoma City today.
Let me back up a bit. He completed all his chemo and radiation, went back to the oncologist and his surgeon in Lawton in the last several weeks. His surgeon in Lawton decided to refer him to a Rectal-Colon Surgeon in Oklahoma City in hopes of lessening his chances of having a bag.
Anyhow, he went for that first visit this morning. The outcome of that visit : He has another colonoscipy (you would think I could spell that darn word by now as many times as I've texted and typed it) a week from this Thursday at an outpatient center near Mercy Hospital in Oklahoma City. Then he will have the 3-4 hour surgery on Tuesday, April 26th at Baptist Integris in OKC. They do think he will have a bag for 3-4 months after the surgery. The main reason is because the rectum will have to be removed because of the location of the cancer. It all sounds a bit scary to me, however I am attempting to stay positive. I know that all situations, people, cancer cases are different and most importantly, out of my control. God is in control always. Thank goodness He already knows all of it and how it will all end up for His glory and benefit.
On another note, I had a bit of a breakdown at church yesterday (yes, on my birthday!) Mike Tompkins filled in for Curtis yesterday preaching. He told his story of colon cancer and the miracles God worked in him. He also told how one day your world can be going just perfect and wake up the next and everything be turned upside down and how many people are sitting in the congregation going through the worst experiences of their life. I could not control my tears. I usually can. He also discussed putting on your "big girl panties" and getting over it, suck it up, move on, etc. :) I guess that's what I tend to do most of the time and oftentimes do not take the time to let all the frustration, bad days, etc. get out. I had my moment. The poor woman sitting next to me was a visitor and I had her crying as well. After the service, she asked if I was okay. How sweet of her to even notice me! :) Then, I just said that my dad was going through the colon cancer fight himself and going tomorrow for the pre-op visit and it just hit a little too close to home. It ends up she works in the field herself and was touched in many different ways by cancer. She introduced herself to me. It was once again a reminder that God has my back even through strangers.
My sister seems to be doing better, however she is so private at times, it is really hard to tell. I've taken the boys over to visit my grandmother twice since Christmas Eve. The first time was all roses, but the second visit the thorns came out again. She is still angry with me. I do have a hard time with that since me standing up and protecting the rest of my family would have never happened had she not tried to place blame on anyone for the horrible word, "CANCER!" I trust God that everything happens for a reason and this is just part of His plan. I will not put myself in a position to be burned or have my children be hurt, however I forgive her, love her and pray daily that God's ultimate plan will be revealed to all involved. There's a lot of hurt there, so please continue praying for the emotional aspect of all this for not only our immediate family, but the extended family as well.
We have baseball practices twice a week and at least one game per week. I've been taking numerous senior shoots and placing orders so that seniors can get their pics into announcements to be sent out. It seems like it just never slows down. Maddux is doing great with his potty training. He wore big boy undies ALL DAY today! :) We are also working on keeping him in his toddler bed all night. Hunter is such a sweet kiddo. For my birthday, he picked me a handful of wildflowers (mainly yellow with one red one in the center.) When he handed them to me he said, "Mom, you stand out from the rest!" Moments like that remind me that I am so very blessed! :)
